Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 11th August 2021, 9:38 AM

The Beatles' Why Don't We Do It In the road was ''''''''''inspired'''''''''' by the sight of two monkeys copulating i.e. mating i.e. bonking.
I use that fact to break the ice at job interviews. I am unemployed.
PS Please Please Me was an expression John used to urge ladies to snurk his glurk.
PS I love you. Dear Prudence. Dear Friend. My Secret Friend. Dear Yoko. Oh Yoko.

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Again, a nice try but you can't fool me by altering the spelling of Monkees. Micky Dolenz and Davy Jones were real people - not animals - even if Dolenz went through the first ever human to robot reassignment at Papworth under the great Dr Christiaan Barnard Bostock-Smith to become Metal Mickey and (B) Jones spent most of his time closeted in an underwater locker for fear of being turned into a maharishi by pirates.

The Monkees were total and utter f**king shit. Even the f**king name is shit. At least Beatles is a pun. Monkees is just a stupid f**king way to spell a word. Hey guys, gotta great name for a band, The Mongoozes. Smart!
Surprised no one answered Eric Burdon.
Hello Little Girl. Hi hi hi. Good morning, good morning. Good day Sunshine. Hello Goodbye. Goodnight Tonight. Goodnight. Goodnight Vienna. Goodbye.

I learned only this very morning that the final straw for the Beatles was when George Harrison caught yoko nicking one of his biscuits and called her a bitch

Paul said to George and Ringo, I wouldn't marry Yoko. They said, Nor we. John would.
I once went to a party and had to sleep in the same room as two animals having it off. Rosella and Georgio.

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 11th August 2021, 12:33 PM

Paul said to George and Ringo, I wouldn't marry Yoko. They said, Nor we. John would.

.

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John Lennon's wife drops an egg. 'Yolk, oh, oh no.'
I once watch a dog hump my leg. Does that count?

Were you stark bollock naked at the time?

I was tempted.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 9th August 2021, 8:59 PM

Nice story.

But quote "something must have worked.".

You didn't actually see sex happening did you.

I believe you have successfully proved my point.

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No, you're right - I never saw the hardcore, boar's* penis in the sow's vagina; mind you, I was probably about ten and I was already horribly bullied for being weird, so maybe I did myself a favour by leaving the aforementioned garden and going back inside to watch Grange Hill or suchlike? It certainly hasn't affected the way I think about guinea pigs, although I've never owned one as an adult.

*I still recall the terminology; they used to bully me at school by saying that I was sexually interested in guinea pigs. I wasn't.