Tell us a joke Page 251

Incest? You get aunts in yer pants.

I think lockdown may have been making me eat more than usual. I got dressed this morning and noticed all my buttons have begun socially distancing from each other.

My wife's forbidden me from watching Spice Girls videos. I'm in cockdown.

What's the difference between Covid-19 and 'Romeo and Juliet'?

One's a Coronavirus and the other's a Verona Crisis.

Shakespeare didn't know what to call his son. Toby or...?

Quote: alison blunderland @ 22nd January 2021, 12:57 PM

What's the difference between Covid-19 and 'Romeo and Juliet'?

One's a Coronavirus and the other's a Verona Crisis.

Laughing out loud

What does a lucky penis have in common with Buggles? Horn and lips on.

All the babies currently being conceived in lockdown - in 2033, are they going to be known as 'quaranteens'?

My wife thinks my sense of humour is childish-cum-predictable. Ha ha! 'Cum'!

All the babies currently being conceived in lockdown - when they're born and for the rest of their lives, are they going to be known as 'Coronials'?

Latest sex offender suspect is Scooby Doo. Meddlin' kids.

Used condoms are more expensive. They've got over heads.

On this day 28th January 1912 American painter Jackson Pollock was born. A leading exponent of Abstract Expressionism for his radical poured "drip" technique, but his major work was known by his critiques as a load of old pollocks.

Scientists say they can clone 'Speed' actress Sandra 7639 times. What a load of Bullocks.

On this day 30th January 1933 the fiction character the Lone Ranger was introduced on radio station WXYZ in Detroit, Michigan. It was broadcast on the radio at Tonto six in the evening.