Tell us a joke Page 247

'Swan Song'

I say KaMAYla and you say KaMARla.
I say I hate her but you say you heart her.
KaMAYla, KaMARla, I hate her, you heart her.
Let's call the whole thing off.

No, seriously guys. It needs to be called off. The ballot was rigged. And what's with the white coats? Take your hands off meeeeeee!

Biden........Bye Don. Lets call the whole thing off. Rumour has it that Trump has commited suicide by hanging. It was however FAKE NOOSE. Boom boom........aythangyew.

First ever female Vice-President! A huge step forward in women's liberation... And she's a pretty little thing too.

Quote: paulted @ 8th November 2020, 3:39 PM

Biden........Bye Don. Lets call the whole thing off. Rumour has it that Trump has commited suicide by hanging. It was however FAKE NOOSE. Boom boom........aythangyew.

Very good :D, [ but you forgot the Thrrrrump Tishhhhhh.

What did John Lennon say to Ian Curtis? I know you're depressed, but nothing to get hung about.
What did John Lennon say to Ian Curtis the next day? Let me take you down.

You're a compulsive gambler. - Wanna bet?

Why is it that when a woman claims to have numerous sexual partners she's called a "slag", but when I make the same claim people call me a "fat, ugly, lying bastard"?

Benedict Cumberbatch has been told that he's constipated.
No shit Sherlock.......

Quote: paulted @ 15th November 2020, 9:55 AM

No shit Sherlock.......

Watson, I'm constipated.
Leslie Crowther jerks off to feathers. Come on down.

I want to be the largest city in Pennsylvania. - Don't be Philly.

Quote: paulted @ 15th November 2020, 9:55 AM

Why is it that when a woman claims to have numerous sexual partners she's called a "slag",.

I call her Mum. Or Spinster.
I don't want to admit to jerking off in a vegetable patch. But the thyme has come.

What was that old old movie about a n anthropomorphic Volkswagen who was also a vegetarian?
I remember now, it was Herbie 4

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 4th December 2020, 10:11 PM

What was that old old movie about a n anthropomorphic Volkswagen who was also a vegetarian?
I remember now, it was Herbie 4

Herbie Eats Bananas

My dad's convinced he can hear a buzzing sound from the front of his car. Always did have a bee in his bonnet.

I remember once the Russians were spying on me using the evasive wasp
Oh no that's not right it was the Cagey Bee

Quote: gappy @ 5th December 2020, 7:14 PM

Herbie Eats Bananas

:D