The Monarchy

Can somebody remind me what they are for? The country is in a god-awful mess and all we have is Auld Lizzie creeping about with an inane smile on her face trying to work out how self-service check-outs work. What other pensioner still gets paid full salary for doing f**k all?

Prince George is so rich he's already dating a toddler half his age!

We still have a monarchy cos the English love them and always have done - why? Dunno maybe cos were a bunch of sycophants and morons

Throughout history they have done nothing but send people to fight in stupid wars, commit mass murder in the name of religion, invade peaceful countries just for the sake of it, cut people's heads off for nothing , sit and watch people starve to death in poverty while they live in luxury and generally behave like a bunch of utter c**ts

The french saw them for what they are and dealt with them

We didn't - which means we will probably be stuck with them for ever and ever

And now? Well yeah they have no power to behave like animals like their disgusting ancestors- unstead we pay them millions and millions of pounds year after year for doing sod all worthwhile

And the English still love them and always will

Personally I wouldn't piss on them if they were on fire

Quote: lofthouse @ 24th May 2019, 8:12 PM

We still have a monarchy cos the English love them and always have done - why? Dunno maybe cos were a bunch of sycophants and morons

Throughout history they have done nothing but send people to fight in stupid wars, commit mass murder in the name of religion, invade peaceful countries just for the sake of it, cut people's heads off for nothing , sit and watch people starve to death in poverty while they live in luxury and generally behave like a bunch of utter c**ts

The french saw them for what they are and dealt with them

We didn't - which means we will probably be stuck with them for ever and ever

And now? Well yeah they have no power to behave like animals like their disgusting ancestors- unstead we pay them millions and millions of pounds year after year for doing sod all worthwhile

And the English still love them and always will

Personally I wouldn't piss on them if they were on fire

Yes. And I note you always reference 'England'. Bear in mind Auld Lizzie is Lizzie First, not second because Bad Queen Bess was never queen of Scotland.

They're there to keep you Scotch in order.

Quote: Chappers @ 24th May 2019, 9:54 PM

They're there to keep you Scotch in order.

Fat chance. Useless arses. And It's Scots, by the way. What are they doing to make your life better?

Quote: Briosaid @ 24th May 2019, 10:31 PM

And It's Scots, by the way.

Oh dear Brio you finally fell for it - he has been saying "Scotch" for months now to try and wind you up. Perhaps now he'll stop his little dig.

Naughty boy Chappers! I'll have to slap your botty.

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 25th May 2019, 12:12 AM

Oh dear Brio you finally fell for it - he has been saying "Scotch" for months now to try and wind you up. Perhaps now he'll stop his little dig.

Naughty boy Chappers! I'll have to slap your botty.

:OAngelic

The royal baby weighed just over eight pounds, and just over eight pounds is what it'll cost you every second of its life.

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 25th May 2019, 11:01 AM

The royal baby weighed just over eight pounds, and just over eight pounds is what it'll cost you every second of its life.

Regardless of whether one views the monarchy positively or negatively, that is an excellent joke! Laughing out loud

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 25th May 2019, 11:01 AM

The royal baby weighed just over eight pounds, and just over eight pounds is what it'll cost you every second of its life.

If only you could have been as funny as this on my course.

If only anyone could have been as funny as this on my course.

Quote: Paul Wimsett @ 25th May 2019, 11:59 AM

If only you could have been as funny as this on my course.

If only anyone could have been as funny as this on my course.

OK, but don't inflate his ego by repeating it. :P

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 25th May 2019, 11:01 AM

The royal baby weighed just over eight pounds, and just over eight pounds is what it'll cost you every second of its life.

When I first saw the above post, I was immediately tempted to comment "Where's Beverley Allitt when you need her?"

Then I thought, "That's not going to go down at all well with the PC Brigade".

And then I thought, "F**k 'em!"

Cool

Quote: Briosaid @ 24th May 2019, 7:35 PM

Can somebody remind me what they are for? The country is in a god-awful mess and all we have is Auld Lizzie creeping about with an inane smile on her face trying to work out how self-service check-outs work. What other pensioner still gets paid full salary for doing f**k all?

The obvious alternative as head of state is, of course, a president. Although, based on recent experience in other countries, certain people may not be happy about that if the candidate they don't support gets elected...

Quote: Rood Eye @ 25th May 2019, 1:12 PM

When I first saw the above post, I was immediately tempted to comment "Where's Beverley Allitt
when you need her?"

Then I thought, "That's not going to go down at all well with the PC Brigade".

And then I thought, "F**k 'em!"

Cool

I don't think it's about being PC it's not seeing humour in a gag about a baby being murdered regardless of the family it's born in to.