Tell us a joke Page 213

What's the difference between eggs and your dick? You don't teach grandma to such eggs.

One I overheard today when picking mini me up from music (not sure if it's an oldie, I'd not heard it before):

What's blue and smells like red paint?
Blue paint.

Well...made me chuckle.

What's the difference between eggs and your dick? You don't teach grandma to such eggs.

Bonus chuckle for anyone that can spot such a deliberate spelling mistake.

If there was a way of hiding it - it would be an 'easter egg' !

I'l get my anorak

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 9th June 2018, 12:07 PM

What's the difference between eggs and your dick? You don't teach grandma to such eggs.

Which eggs?

Daleks occasionally skip breakfast. Eggs terminate.

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 9th June 2018, 7:04 PM

Daleks occasionally skip breakfast. Eggs terminate.

Oh yea - so how'd they feed themselves

[ Im practising my heckling ]

Cross between a chicken and a cow was upset. Fowl mooed.

What's the difference between aperitivo and apericena? 25 Euros.

Don't you hate it when someone phones you and you miss it but call them back and the wanker never answers? That's why I stopped working for the Samaritans.

I felt a failure last night. Still, finally got a fiver out of my dad.

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 18th June 2018, 6:30 PM

I felt a failure last night. Still, finally got a fiver out of my dad.

[Heckling] was it to go away [/Heckling]

You haven't seen my dad.
Tiziano Ferro said he always goes to the same church. I said, Where do you sit? He said, Mai piĆ¹. (I'm really, really sorry.)

Well I get the My Pew bit but what does it mean?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMLVIRFo6Ow Why are my my jokes like a porn actress' undies? They're never on 'air

Why are my my jokes like a porn actress' undies? They're never on 'air

[Fluke thumps forehead, half pirouettes and expires.]