I'm fed up.
Just had me dinner.

Katie said we Khan have a muslin Mayor of London. Silly sausage.

A lion wouldnt cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood.

Why can't Barbie get pregnant?

Because Ken comes in a different box.

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 8th May 2016, 12:34 PM BST

Which comedian's house had fewer entrances? Less Doors-on.

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best joke I've heard this week Michael.

Quote: Will Cam @ 9th May 2016, 11:22 PM BST

best joke I've heard this week Michael.

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Fewer

Thanks!
Ringo Starr's dick suffering from old age. It don't come easy.

My neighbors are complaining because they saw me sunbathing in the backyard. Like I knew it was their backyard.

A senior policeman investigating the disappearance of Ben Needham on a Greek island has been summoned back to the UK and suspended amid reports members of his team went on an eight-hour drinking session.

The officer in question is said to be disappointed and went on to say once things have been resolved, he hopes to follow up leads in Corfu, Ibiza, Aya Napa and the Bahamas.

Despite being sacked, Roberto Martinez has said thank you to the Everton fans for making him feel like "one of them."

Unemployed.

Quote: Nick81 @ 12th May 2016, 2:28 PM BST

Despite being sacked, Roberto Martinez has said thank you to the Everton fans for making him feel like "one of them."

Unemployed.

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Churchill wasn't always victorious. Yer Winston, yer lose some.

Quentin Tarantino has bought a Cornwall vicarage. Truro manse.

I persuaded my parents, brother, uncle and cousin to let me have sex with them. Lay on five.

I've had it with puns.
Haven't we been 'pun'ished enough?

I'm fed up with the guy who shares fish with me. I've haddock with him.