Help with a play? Page 2

Hi Playfull, I'm mostly into screenwriting but I've written a play or two and as an actor I've been involved in plenty.

Feel free to send it over to me and I'll offer what I can. I've got a few days off so I'm more than happy to take a look.

That's a nice move Ashley, you seem as keen to help as you are to show and that is the essence of a half right poster.

On a lighter note the pose you have in your photo makes you look like one of those people you suspect you may have to punch at some point.

I am of course joking but seriously I think it makes you look a tad pompous and you're clearly not and seeing as it's all about brand image, I think you could have a better shot of you up there. IMHO

hahaha it's actually from a short film I was in and yes you would very much want to punch that character.

There are a lot of punchable people in life.

You're not wrong there Ashley

Quote: playfull @ 26th November 2013, 10:35 PM GMT

Be my guest AJGO and good luck with it.

As to my play - still stuck at about fifteen pages I'm afraid - I all too often find 'not writing' gets in the way of 'writing'.

Cheers- and true dat! Have you thought about adapting it into a short to see if you like what you've got?

Quote: keewik @ 27th November 2013, 9:53 AM GMT

First of all, well done AJGO for getting that commission!

I've written 2 full-lengths which have never seen the light of day. The first was utter drivel. The second was really 2 one-acts stuck together - I didn't mean it to be like that, needless to say, but at least I was able to salvage the first bit and use it as a one-act and it's been performed.

I've often thought that if you could use the structure of pantomime to write an adult play, it would be a great success. The only advice I can offer, from the pantos I've written and the full-lengths I've acted in, is that the first act should end with some sort of cliff-hanger, so the audience are desperate to know what happens next and don't leave after the interval.

Thanks hun, isn't too impressive, just a producer at same level as me (bottom of the ladder!) who likes my work and wants to go hand in hand onto hopefully a good opportunity; will at least be a learning experience even if it doesn't work out but fingers crossed as she's doing well, building up experience and useful contacts.

Good call on the not losing the audience at half-time! Your panto thought is an intriguing idea and I shall think about it more...
Maybe a tragedy about losing a shoe :O Teary

Is it a comedy play AJGO?

Quote: Marc P @ 28th November 2013, 11:02 AM GMT

Is it a comedy play AJGO?

Pay attention Marc!

tragedy about losing a shoe :O Teary

It'll prob be comedy-drama. Had some nice bits of dialogue running around for an idea that was very heavy on the feelings but everything I've written lately has been rather sad so I need to write some comedy before I go peculiarer in the head!

Loops yes of course, sorry. If comedy in it get a very big laugh in as soon as possible. Preferably in the first minute. Remember the physicality of theatre write lots of 'business' in. Think in terms of three acts. Have fun with it and the audience will too. Make it a high heeled shoe.

Have you thought of making it a clear or see through shoe? Maybe some sort of glass?

No wait a minute Health & Safety would go mad at that...

Quote: Marc P @ 28th November 2013, 11:54 AM GMT

Loops

Where is Loopey? She's good at this sort of thing. *Bellows for Loopey across hills and dales*

Quote: Marc P @ 28th November 2013, 11:54 AM GMT

yes of course, sorry. If comedy in it get a very big laugh in as soon as possible. Preferably in the first minute. Remember the physicality of theatre write lots of 'business' in. Think in terms of three acts. Have fun with it and the audience will too.

Thank you, think have a couple of first minute laughs planned now although still working out what it's about! Thanks for reminder re putting physicality in, is so easy to try to make other people's lives easier and end up with just dialogue.

Quote: Marc P @ 28th November 2013, 11:54 AM GMT

Make it a high heeled shoe.

:D Marc P's Mottos For Life

Quote: playfull @ 28th November 2013, 12:34 PM GMT

Have you thought of making it a clear or see through shoe? Maybe some sort of glass?

No wait a minute Health & Safety would go mad at that...

That's a really nice idea. I'm quite annoyed I haven't thought of it. Write it before some other bugger does. Or give me permission to have your idea if you don't want it at any point!

Quote: AJGO @ 28th November 2013, 1:57 PM GMT

That's a really nice idea. I'm quite annoyed I haven't thought of it. Write it before some other bugger does. Or give me permission to have your idea if you don't want it at any point!

If you have a good home for it please use it!

Actually somebody I know has just written a version of Cinderella which has no glass shoe because Cinders thinks it would be dangerous!

Is it a glass eye?