Absent friends Page 111

Quote: Ben @ 16th April 2014, 7:22 PM BST

Actually I think she probably is the only mod.

I don't post, but I'm always there.

Quote: L.E. @ 17th April 2014, 11:22 AM BST

...I'm always there.

So, we can communicate with you through an ouija board, then?

Or PM me. :)

Quote: zooo @ 16th April 2014, 8:58 PM BST

Hah. I think there's probably slash for literally everyone you could imagine. Blur at least makes sense, because they were jolly handsome.

There's slash fiction about me and I'm not even famous! Wish I hadn't written it now.

Heh.
The big question is, who did you team yourself up with...

Quote: zooo @ 17th April 2014, 2:51 PM BST

Heh.
The big question is, who did you team yourself up with...

I've just written a fantastic bit of slash entitled: 'Renegade Carpark and the Woman Who Doesn't Exist'. Here is an extract from Chapter 5 -

RC heard the familiar sound of the key turning in the lock, Impossible Girl was home later than usual today.

'Sup' muttered RC, barely averting his gaze from Pointless.

'Sorry I'm a bit late but something really funny happened at work today. Do you know that girl I work with...Karen?' responded Impossible Girl enthusiastically.

'No, I don't know Karen' stuttered RC nervously, the fear of what was to come evident in his terrified eyes.

But instead of being told Karen's life story, where she lives, what her cats are like, what she eats for lunch everyday and the standard 15 minute monologue full of useless information about someone RC didn't know and didn't care about, Impossible Girl just replied.

'Oh then don't worry about it, the story wasn't that great anyway. I'll get the dinner on. What time does the match start?'

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 17th April 2014, 5:31 PM BST

I've just written a fantastic bit of slash entitled: 'Renegade Carpark and the Woman Who Doesn't Exist'. Here is an extract from Chapter 5 -

RC heard the familiar sound of the key turning in the lock, Impossible Girl was home later than usual today.

'Sup' muttered RC, barely averting his gaze from Pointless.

'Sorry I'm a bit late but something really funny happened at work today. Do you know that girl I work with...Karen?' responded Impossible Girl enthusiastically.

'No, I don't know Karen' stuttered RC nervously, the fear of what was to come evident in his terrified eyes.

But instead of being told Karen's life story, where she lives, what her cats are like, what she eats for lunch everyday and the standard 15 minute monologue full of useless information about someone RC didn't know and didn't care about, Impossible Girl just replied.

'Oh then don't worry about it, the story wasn't that great anyway. I'll get the dinner on. What time does the match start?'

Who the f**k were you talking to
said Renegade's Right hand

No one babes
stuttered Renegade

He's a lying shit bag lets do him
Snapped the left hand

Ooyah
Shrieked Renegade as rightie thumped him on the nose and lefty whacked him in the balls

We're lesbians now
Said Lefty

And Rightie and Lefty writhed together in an obsene cat's cradle

As Renegade through his tears added their shenanigans to his wank bank

Phwoor

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 17th April 2014, 5:31 PM BST

I've just written a fantastic bit of slash entitled: 'Renegade Carpark and the Woman Who Doesn't Exist'. Here is an extract from Chapter 5 -

RC heard the familiar sound of the key turning in the lock, Impossible Girl was home later than usual today.

'Sup' muttered RC, barely averting his gaze from Pointless.

'Sorry I'm a bit late but something really funny happened at work today. Do you know that girl I work with...Karen?' responded Impossible Girl enthusiastically.

'No, I don't know Karen' stuttered RC nervously, the fear of what was to come evident in his terrified eyes.

But instead of being told Karen's life story, where she lives, what her cats are like, what she eats for lunch everyday and the standard 15 minute monologue full of useless information about someone RC didn't know and didn't care about, Impossible Girl just replied.

'Oh then don't worry about it, the story wasn't that great anyway. I'll get the dinner on. What time does the match start?'

Laughing out loud

That story made me horny. What a girl!

Quote: Renegade Carpark @ 17th April 2014, 5:31 PM BST

I've just written a fantastic bit of slash entitled: 'Renegade Carpark and the Woman Who Doesn't Exist'. Here is an extract from Chapter 5 -

RC heard the familiar sound of the key turning in the lock, Impossible Girl was home later than usual today.

'Sup' muttered RC, barely averting his gaze from Pointless.

'Sorry I'm a bit late but something really funny happened at work today. Do you know that girl I work with...Karen?' responded Impossible Girl enthusiastically.

'No, I don't know Karen' stuttered RC nervously, the fear of what was to come evident in his terrified eyes.

But instead of being told Karen's life story, where she lives, what her cats are like, what she eats for lunch everyday and the standard 15 minute monologue full of useless information about someone RC didn't know and didn't care about, Impossible Girl just replied.

'Oh then don't worry about it, the story wasn't that great anyway. I'll get the dinner on. What time does the match start?'

I'm totally confused by this. Why is this strange?

Quote: Jennie @ 17th April 2014, 6:34 PM BST

I'm totally confused by this. Why is this strange?

Some women have a tendency to bombard men with an information overload of pure triviality and can turn a mildly amusing 30 second anecdote into 20 minutes of interminable noise.

It's like watching a Stewart Lee routine without the jokes, social insight or punch line that ties up all the loose tangents.

Men have a tendency to 'zone out' when the endless meandering kicks in, which then causes the women to say 'Are you listening to me?' and the inevitable row.

In short, men like a point to a story. Women like to waffle on without actually saying anything. Whereas women think it's quite exciting to hear a 45 minute story about how someone nearly bought a pair of shoes, changed their mind and then didn't, men prefer if people speak succinctly and quickly.

As everyone keeps saying, you seem to surround yourself with some right twats.

Quote: zooo @ 17th April 2014, 7:32 PM BST

As everyone keeps saying, you seem to surround yourself with some right twats.

That's no way to talk about the posters on the BCG. ;) :P

I'm not a twat! A dick maybe...

Quote: Gordon Bennett @ 17th April 2014, 7:37 PM BST

I'm not a twat! A dick maybe...

Surely a twat is better than a dick.