So, I've been doing stand-up for a few months now. I'm pretty comfortable on stage and people tend to enjoy my sets. The negative feedback I get from the hosts though is I don't expand on my jokes enough. That I cut too quickly to the next joke. Anyone have any tips on how to expand on jokes while writing?

I know I worded like weird.

Welcome to the forum Roxxy.

It's a difficult to offer advice without reading or hearing your material. I have spotted quite a few comics not expanding on what I feel is fodder material and should/could be milked. You also get comics who expand on one joke for an entire set.

The trick is to work on transitions.

Find a joke that logically links too others.

For example in a recent routine I do a long list joke about zebras and then another one that's all about Nigel Ferrage evil British politician.

So it goes
I hate zebras
I don't why zebras think they're so special, its not like they ever won the grand national. They're just ponys with a silly paint job and a stupid name.

I like Nigel Farrage, he'd eat a zebra just the white bits, he'd send the black bits back.

Nigel is a great bloke he told me the best way to see if a date's going to go all the way, is to look behind their fridge.

That's brilliant soot!

Smut!

Quote: sootyj @ 24th October 2014, 5:00 PM BST

The trick is to work on transitions.

Find a joke that logically links too others.

For example in a recent routine I do a long list joke about zebras and then another one that's all about Nigel Ferrage evil British politician.

So it goes
I hate zebras
I don't why zebras think they're so special, its not like they ever won the grand national. They're just ponys with a silly paint job and a stupid name.

I like Nigel Farrage, he'd eat a zebra just the white bits, he'd send the black bits back.

Nigel is a great bloke he told me the best way to see if a date's going to go all the way, is to look behind their fridge.

View original

thanks

Hope I was of help, I realise my tips now look like the ramblings of a mad man

Another technique used is, particularly for longer sets, is to have one strong narrative spine, a central idea or story (which doesn't have to be particularly clever in itself) and then hang jokes/bits off it on tangents, almost as if you were suddenly reminded of them as you went along. Then go back to the original thread.

E.g. a stupid example.

So I was going to the shop to get some milk, you know the corner shop just past the chicken hut - do a bit about chickens - and on the way I met Mrs Smith who is a pigeon breeder - do a bit about pigeon breeders - and then I nearly fell down an open manhole - there are no possible jokes about manholes, move on... - then I got to the shop and it was out of milk etc.

That's a not an actually funny example, so you can see the stitching but I hope it gives you an idea of the structure. Watch some of you favourite pro comics, I'll bet you find a lot of them use it.

The advantage of this is you can just throw a little joke in as an aside or go off on a five minute anecdote and it still all feels like one "thing" because of the main thread.

EDIT: And Soots tip is also very good (and can be used together with this).

sootyj

I hope you got a new joke book this Christmas.

I did.....sadly you wrote it.

sootyj
Sorry I didn't mean to be rude.
I should critique constructively.
The silly painted horses joke was first told by a Masai warrior during the stone age.
The second joke about Nigel Farrage was lazy stereotype.
Come on Sootj you are better than this.

By-the-way will you please tell Godot Taxi I'm still waiting, for either of them

Oh just demonstrating what a joke looks like.

You seemed to be asking in a round about way. The Serenity rover is more likely to find a decent joke in the milennia dead deserts of Mars then you in the vacant, caves of your wit.

But one question, why do you bother?

Is there a moral difference between;
Shooting women and children at point blank range and dropping bombs on them from 20,000 ft.

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ 26th December 2014, 7:54 PM GMT

Is there a moral difference between;
Shooting women and children at point blank range and dropping bombs on them from 20,000 ft.

View original

I'd like to hear the joke that remark segues nicely into.

Quote: Jerf Roberwitz @ 26th December 2014, 7:54 PM GMT

Is there a moral difference between;
Shooting women and children at point blank range and dropping bombs on them from 20,000 ft.

View original

Does that chat etc